Myth: Children need their father even if he is violent.
Fact: Women sometimes do stay in violent relationships "for the sake of the children." The fact is that
children say they would rather live with one parent than in a violent home. If not separated from a
violent father, children often repeat the observed behaviors in their own adult relationships thus
perpetuating the cycle of violence.
Myth: Religious beliefs will prevent battering.
Fact: Women and men without religious preferences are more likely to use violence, but religious
convictions or strict Biblical interpretations are often an excuse for violence.
Myth: External factors that place stress on a marriage - such as financial difficulties, moving, having a
baby, or on-the-job problems - are what cause a person to batter his or her spouse.
Fact: Nearly every adult faces those stressful situations at some time, but most people deal with their
problems without resorting to abusing a family member. If the predisposition toward violence exists,
external pressures such as those listed above may certainly precipitate abuse.
Myth: A woman who is occasionally slapped by her husband is in no danger of real harm because, while he
may continue to slap her, he will do nothing any worse.
Fact: A pattern of battering that goes unchecked usually becomes both more frequent and more severe. A
man who begins by slapping his wife is likely to progress to more prolonged battering episodes, and often
will eventually begin using a weapon instead of just his hands.
Myth: Many men cannot be held responsible for violence against their wives because they are drunk and out
of control at the time.
Fact: While alcohol or drugs are involved in a significant number of battering relationships, alcohol may
unconsciously be used as an excuse by the husband (i.e. he may actually drink before beating his wife so
that he will not have to take responsibility for his actions, which in turn will lessen his guilt later for having
abused the one he loves).
Myth: A woman who is battered can end the violence against her by moving out of the house, separating
from her husband.
Fact: The violence often becomes worse when a woman tries to escape an abusive husband. The husband
may go the great extremes to track down his wife and continue to harass and beat her.
The material on this web page was prepared by Project Horizon, a non-profit entity, based in Lexington Virginia.
Project Horizon is dedicated to reducing domestic, dating, and sexual violence through crisis intervention services and prevention programs.
